I hung out with Shanti and Tim today and had a blast. We were driving up to the Hess near the village when a three foot long black snake fell out of the motorcycle in front of us. First we thought it was a belt, then a piece of the bike, and then the guy pulled over in the station and looked at us like he'd just shit a brick. Good times indeed. We then had ice cream at Lakeside Licks, one of those seasonal places that always reopens under a new name, where we chose from 32 flavors of soft serve. I myself had plain old strawberry in a cup, because I've never liked the taste of cones. Tim related a story he called "the summer of coning," during which he always grabbed the ice cream rather than the cone while being served and expressionlessly walked away. Also, the theoretical gods of ice cream were discussed; we concluded that there are probably a few of them, each with a particular domain (fruity flavors, ice cream with unnecessary candy additions, etc.) Lastly, we discovered some fridge horror behind Forever 21: if you work there, they kill you off after you reach 22 (and probably make cheaply manufactured clothing out of your remains.)
The three of us headed out to Hoe Bowl on the Hill, the less local of our bowling alleys. Fortunately, it happened to be after 8 on a Friday, Saturday or Sunday and we came in time for cosmic bowling, a.k.a. blacklights and general awesomeness. I displayed my wildly inconsistent bowling abilities. At one point I threw two gutters followed by a strike, and things went downhill from there. Shanti made sure to point out the gaggle of questionably attired girls in the next lane over to me and Tim; I, in turn, noted that they were about fourteen and were acting like five year olds. We hung out for a bit in the arcade, where I smashed Shanti at air hockey. There was also an eerie skee ball machine in the back, hiding behind a few games. This machine was on, but everything else around it was not. It also seemed to be broken or rigged so as not to require money, so we played for several minutes and discussed the possible supernatural ramifications of its presence. ("Throw the 1000-pointer and your fortunes will improve; sink a 10 and you eat shit and die!")
Later, Brian and I hung out and watched some movies. We replayed Blade Runner from Rachael's Voight-Kampff test onward, and then watched Big Fish. For a movie that is so hyped among those with great taste in cinema, I was let down. I rarely found myself interested in the plot. Ewan MacGregor's performance was solid, and Helena Bonham Carter's upset me, but I feel as if they were diamonds in the rough. I would have much liked to see what was true and what was not behind the father's tall tales, an element abandoned beyond a few details in the final scene. In my opinion, the greatest problem with Big Fish is its ending. The overarching conflict between the father and son, essentially the point of the movie, isn't resolved in any satisfying or even complete way. Either I missed an extra half hour of an already long picture, or its conclusion is a markedly unappealing finish to a very decent film. To summarize: Big Fish should have been called Big Disappointment.
Quotes of the day:
"I want to start an anti-women gay bar called the Fanged Pussy." - Tim
"I know they have a machine with fake mustaches up the yin-yang in that bitch." - Tim
"Those biddies stole my ball!" - me
"The Brooklyn is just PBR mixed with pretentious thoughts. It's served in a melted Modest Mouse CD and garnished with an American Apparel t-shirt." - Tim
"I don't care what it's called as long as it's the most fabulous bar on the Eastern Seaboard and has very minimally priced drinks." - Tim
"...biddy radar..." - Shanti
"I made a mixed drink called the Foxy Grandma." - Tim
"I also invented a drink called the Abusive Grandfather. It's made with Old Granddad's 100 Proof Whiskey and mixed with nothing but broken dreams and stirred with a rusty nail." - Tim
"I like to mix my drinks with lots of abstract thoughts and emotions." - Tim
"He is such a dick! I'm gonna kick the shit out of him next time I see him!" - Brian
...
Shanti: "You guys should write a guide for this stuff."
Tim: "They already did. Clark v. Biddies, 1974."
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