A Trick of the Tail

          I was a paragon of efficiency at work today, and all of the tasks I'd lined up to get around to were finished by 11 a.m. This led me to turn to my medium-long-term project, the resolution of our affairs with the IRS. In turn, this resulted in me holding for over 45 minutes while the IRS phone system tested my endurance. After some time, the egregiously repetitive hold music and bland, computerized assurances that my call mattered were joined by fuzzes of static, strange grinding noises, and eventually faint voices fading in and out in the background. Bewildered and aggravated, I finally surrendered my (no doubt valuable) place in the phone queue and hung up. I'm driven to wonder if one could monetize said queue. ("The IRS just picked up, $20 to transfer the call to your phone!") In other work news, the scanning operations have begun, and there is an actual Victory Road in Quincy.
          I received a letter from Brian -- with an accompanying note for Iris. He also included a cool Joker button, since I missed the superhero exhibit at Six Flags when everyone went after I was in Boston. I went to dinner at Ginger Exchange with Lauren, and it was a pleasant experience overall. The restaurant is bigger than it appears from outside, and quite long. We were seated immediately next to two girls named Iris and Shandana, which essentially made us a party of four. I chose the orange chicken for my meal, a conventional but palatable choice. Afterward, we walked to CVS and browsed the ridiculous birthday cards ("now with lip gloss!") while Iris picked up skincare products.
          Quotes of the day:
"You didn't promise, but you should have promised, and thus you should keep said promise!" - Iris
...
Iris: "Andy, you know what you should do? Become a personal masseuse for me."
Me: "I already am."
Iris: "But like, more personal."

Closer than you think.