Read This or I'll Attack You with Wild Animals; Or, Iris Gives Me All of Her Clothes

          Not bad for a Tuesday. In Symphony, my caffeine-fueled professor talked about downloading Mozart off of YouTube and put on his best pirate voice - "Arrr, piracy! Everybody's doing it!" He then spent lots of time talking about how fond Mozart was of dirty humor and the mechanics of the modern piano v. the fortepiano. I wrote what is quite possibly the worst essay I have ever produced, my reflection on All Souls for Enhancing Honors; or, more accurately, my reflection on pages 1-30 of All Souls. At Enhancing Honors I ignored Maureen as usual and read a brilliant article on mathematics that I strongly recommend for everyone. You can find it here ---> http://www.maa.org/devlin/LockhartsLament.pdf
           Post-class, I called a chain of people in Saugerties to figure out when they would be getting off for Thanksgiving (Matt, Logan, Sara, Buddy Potter, Katharine) and finally got through to the last. I also ended up having lovely discussions with Logan and his father Steve, and slightly less lovely text conversations with Buddy and Sara. Logan's call resulted in my invitation to a 4 year old's birthday party -- it's gonna be a rager.
           Iris slipped another little origami shirt under my door (I think they're actually pieces of her wardrobe) but Jaimie and Shandana got two and three, respectively. Like any civilized person, my response was to threaten Iris with violence if she didn't make enough to cover my entire wall and then storm out of her room. I didn't actually expect to receive any more, and when she walked in with thirty in assorted colors while we watched "Ocean's 11," I was floored. Tangentially related, our viewing of that film has led to a new, frightening phrase that beats even "and then a skeleton popped out": "and then George Clooney appeared behind you." He can be anywhere, anytime. Expect him.
           After the film Sabrina treated me to two pieces of information, one good and one bad. Bad: she reminded me that she dislikes trumpets, which has resulted in an indefinite ban from my room. Good: she's been playing Team Fortress 2 in secret, meaning that there is still hope for my friend. Scott and Sean have theorized that women are like objects in Katamari Damacy: tickle them and they huddle together, a process that continues until you can tip and wobble them like a giant ball. Of women. No doubt, research on this subject will continue in the near future. Lastly, it's been found that attacking someone with wild animals is the best end for any conversation. This was observed after a period of Pokemon Yellow emulation.
"I like shorts! They're comfy and easy to wear!" [attacks with wild animals]
"My boyfriend is so cute!" [attacks with wild animals]
"Hey! You're not wearing shorts!" [attacks with wild animals]